Sexual Addictions

What is Sex Addiction?

Whether it’s called sex addiction, or sexually problematic behavior, it’s first important to determine whether you need help or not. Sexual addiction can be defined as a compulsive need for sexual behavior that becomes central to a person’s life, in spite of the negative consequences that may occur. Most people struggling with this issue deny they have a problem.

They often use sex to avoid pain, shame, loneliness or fear. They may also use it to alleviate stress or to reward themselves. Addicts tend to feel waves of guilt and shame, deeply alone and isolated. They may feel depressed, anxious or frustrated with what their life has become. Once addicts get into treatment, these feelings tend to level off and clients can begin to feel hope. Addiction and shame thrive in secrecy and isolation. Finding safe professionals and a recovery community to work with, begins to alleviate the denial and pain. Although the addiction has underlying unresolved trauma and childhood pain which is not your fault, it is your responsibility to determine whether this is a problem and take action to restore your life fully.

Does anything in the list below apply to you?

  • Acting out in various ways (e.g., prostitution or escort services, Massage parlors, strip clubs, affairs, exhibitionism, voyeurism)
  • “Sexting”
  • Participating in sexually related chats
  • Viewing more pornography longer than anticipated, or seeking more hardcore pornography to get an increased “high”
  • Having sexual sites bookmarked
  • Joining sexual sites or searching for specific sexual material
  • Accessing sexual sites from multiple computers
  • Masturbating while viewing sexual material
  • Spending time planning when you can view sexual material
  • Taking increased risks online (e.g., giving out your name, meeting people offline, etc.)
  • Engaging in online fantasy that would be illegal if carried out
  • Having online sexual affairs/encounters
  • Having anonymous hookups
  • Spending inordinate amounts of time obtaining sexual material
  • Having secret e-mail accounts
  • Having cell phone on “lockdown” from significant other
  • Unable to sexually perform with significant other

One of the signs of a serious addiction, is continuing the behaviordespite negative consequences.Does anything in the list below apply to you?

  • When asked about your sexual behaviors, you lie, minimize, or “gaslight” (get angry at and blame others)
  • Neglect social, occupational or recreational activities
  • Continue the behavior despite it hurting those you care for
  • Continue the behavior despite it causing problems in significant relationships
  • Continue the behavior despite it putting your job at risk
  • Continue the behavior despite friends expressing concern about your behavior
  • Experience Porn-Induced Erectile Dysfunction

Another sign of a serious addiction is how it affects your emotional health and feeling trapped in your addiction. Do any of these apply to you?

  • Hiding the behavior from others
  • Justifying the behavior (e.g., “everyone looks at porn”)
  • Blaming others for your behavior
  • Getting angry when someone discusses your behavior
  • Avoiding conversations or people that may know or want to expose your behavior
  • Defensiveness about the behavior
  • Using pornography or acting out as an escape or reward
  • Wanting to stop your sexual behaviors but feeling unable to stop
  • Getting on the Internet for one reason, and ending up viewing pornography
  • Promising yourself “this is the last time”, and yet returning
  • After stopping the behavior, the desire gets stronger for a period of time
  • Repeated attempts to stop result in repeated failures to stop

You CAN heal. Call for an Assessment Today!